What is emotional healing?

“Emotional healing is the process of acknowledging, allowing, accepting, integrating, and processing painful life experiences and strong emotions. It may involve empathy, self-regulation, self-compassion, self-acceptance, mindfulness, and integration.”

Why is it important to emotionally heal from past hurts?

It is important to emotionally heal from past hurts so that we can fully move on and not allow the past to continue to impact us. Whether we are amazing at hiding our pain from friends, family, and partners, we cannot hide from ourselves. There is a saying that says “No matter where you go, there you are”… If you are tired of carrying the baggage of past hurts, experiencing triggers, and not truly allowing yourself to love and be loved those may be signs that you need to heal emotionally.

“Emotional healing teaches us life lessons on coping and adjustment. It creates awareness towards emotional reactions and helps express feelings in a proper way. Thinking and acting upon a situation gives the ability to manage stress. Finding purpose and meaning in life makes the connection well with others and then the focus on good things in life happens.”

When is it important to practice emotional healing?

There are different times in our lives when it is important to practice emotional healing, such as:

• Loss of a loved one

• Divorce

• Breakups

• Job loss

• Abuse (including emotional, physical, and sexual)

• Illness

Here are some signs of emotional pain

• Anger

• Mood swings

• Insomnia

• Insecurity

• Poor self esteem

• Holding onto grudges

• Difficulty forgiving others

• Lack of social communication

How to practice emotional healing?

1. Be honest with yourself and the things that you have been holding onto and the ways in which you continue to perpetuate your own hurt(s) by not working through the emotional pain. Write a list of the things, people, situations that continue to trigger you.

2. Go to therapy. Find a therapist in your area or online through telehealth and begin working through your emotional pain. A therapist will help you sort out a lot of the clutter in your mind and help you focus on what’s important: your healing.

3. Be kind to yourself. This is not the time to beat up on yourself. You are human and you make mistakes and you feel pain whenever someone looses your trust or completely shatters your life. Take time to heal and process the pain.

4. Do not distract. I know it’s SO tempting to just put on a brave face and put your thoughts, feelings, and experiences on the back burner. And truly it does seem to work for the most part. The only problems that arise from distracting are the following:

• It’s a temporary fix so the thoughts and feelings return and sometimes louder and more potent.

• Prolonging the healing process: You never truly get to the root cause of where this started and how to heal

• Increases your unforeseen triggers. We can’t predict when we will be triggered. But distracting makes the triggers worse.

How to know when you’re emotionally healed?

• You are able to talk about the past without any remorse, animosity, and accept it for what it was

• You are able to take a teachable/learning lesson from the situation or begin to use your experience(s) to help prevent others from going through what you’ve experienced; share your story with others who need support/healing as well

• Help others feel less isolated about similar situations/experiences

• Work through the triggers that come up in real time and understand that triggers are a way of your body and mind protecting you from possible outside threats.

• Understanding that healing is not linear and that setbacks may be experienced. However this should not and does not discredit your hard work and healing process.

• You recognize that everyone is different and handles things differently so do not compare your experiences, healing journey, or triggers to ANYONE else.

• Reconciliation is not a prerequisite to healing.

• You set boundaries and protect your inner peace no matter who you’re with

Lastly, it is important to know that you are not alone and that there is such a real thing as fully healing emotionally from your past pain and the ways in which others have caused you pain. But this journey is not for the faint at heart and not for those who refuse help. You are not alone and you have the resources to help you just have to ask. If you are in need of a therapist we are here to help. Contact our front desk today to schedule your first counseling session with one of our amazing therapists.